Saying It The Way You Want It

I was busy coaching a group of entrepreneurs yesterday on the subject of using clean language, or as I like to put it, 'saying it the way you want it'.

One of the main questions of the session was, 'how do we talk about ourselves in business usually?'

The two most common options are; to be supportive, complementary of who we are and what we do - or to be our own worst critic, first in line to doubt the big idea - shooting down the dream.

Which one are you?

Here are a few examples of what clean language might look like as opposed to the disempowering/mixed messages we sometimes opt for.

• I really believe I’d be great at this. (clean).
• I'm not sure, but I think if all goes well and I don't run out of money first I might be good. (disempowering!!!!).
• I will take these steps because they will lead me forward. (clean).
• I'll try, and if I don't fail who knows where they'll take me. (disempowering!!!!!)
• What I really want to do is this. (clean).
• I don’t know what I want. I did want to do this, but I worry I won’t get support and I'll look a fool and I won’t be any good. (Disempowering!!!!!)

Of course, I accentuated the disempowering phrases, or did I?

The aim is to decide once and for all to only use clean language, 'saying it the way you want it', is a prerequisite for successful business.

Top tips

1. Listen and become aware of how many times you downgrade, belittle or somehow garble what it is you really mean to say - and say just what you mean instead!

2. Make a list of all the negatives you use during normal conversation. 'Can't, won't, don't, shouldn't' etc. Thing is, your unconscious mind doesn't process negatives - it takes everything as a positive; so 'I don't want that' really means, 'I do...' Think about business meetings, deals and general situations where you just haven't got what you actually wanted. did you actually state it clearly, in the positive, exactly what that was?

3. Look at your business & marketing plan and see if it can be written in a more positive, enthusiastic, fun, strong, and energetic way. Plans become reality when we work 'on' them as well as immersing ourselves 'in' them. Remember; they need developing and growing just as surely as you grow and develop.

For more info and top tips on how to clean up your language and 'say it the way you want it' click here for my latest online e-programme 'Communication Skills Upgrade' now.