Clean Language

This morning I had a conversation with a fellow coach on the merits of using clean language, more easily described as 'saying what you mean'.

Thinking how you talk to and about yourself, are you supportive, complementary, or your own worst critic, first in line to doubt any bright idea?

Here are a few examples of what clean language might look like as opposed to the disempowering messages we sometimes opt for:

• I really believe I’d be great at this. (clean).


• I'm not sure, but I think if all goes well and I don't run out of money first I might be good. (disempowering!!!!).


• I will take these steps because they will lead me forward. (clean).


• I'll try, and if I don't fail who knows where they'll take me. (disempowering!!!!!)


• What I really want to do is this. (clean).


• I don’t know what I want. I did want to do this, but I worry I won’t get support and I'll look a fool and I won’t be any good. (Disempowering!!!!!

Even though I accentuated the disempowering phrases…when have you ever heard anyone like you come up with phrases similar to those above?

The ultimate aim would be to decide once and for all to only ever use clean language from this moment on. If you did, who might you be able to model as a guiding light of how the positive effects of using clean language could be?

I've modelled many mentors along the way, some available personaly, and others only available by reading their books or watching them on DVD. Here are my top tips:

1. Listen and become aware of how many times you belittle or reduce your light in the world. We all do it sometimes, and just imagine if we did it less how we might then shine more


2. Make a list of negatives you use. 'Can't, won't, don't, shouldn't' etc. Thing is, the unconscious mind doesn't process negatives; so 'I don't want to be a smoker' really becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, 'I do want to be a smoker'. Ouch! Not nice. Make a list every time you say anything negative. Write it down.


3. Look at your plan and see if it can be written in a more positive, enthusiastic, fun, strong, and loving way. In fact, do it anyway! Plans tend to happen more rapidly when we work 'on' them and 'in' them, meaning they need developing and growing just as surely as you grow and develop.


4. Tonality - even when you're in a new place in your life, make it sound fabulous and confidant. Fiona's tip for Saturday's Success Group was to 'act as if'. Sounding confident and self-assured about your project will increase your effectiveness, and you will find yourself believing it too, sooner than you think. Practice to a mirror, to a friend, your coach, the world – do it!


5. Physiology. 55%. This is the most instant way to feel better, and for other people to see the difference; walk taller (in every way). Look the part, walk the part, play the part, and finally you will become the part.